Memento - What's Left After The End

[Self-Quoting 51-60]

2010-03-18T20:41:00.000+01:00

51] It's not how it looks. It's how it's presented.
52] Even when I had nothing, I've always had issues.
53] Holly crap, it's Holly Gral!
54] How often have you thought "I can do better"? And how often have you done it? There you go.
55] Heaven held me... Heaven dropped.
56] Wonders come in pairs, that's what makes them wonderful.
57] I was the end of that beginning you thought you were in the middle of.
58] A smile is such a harmless lie, used to hide what you hold inside.
59] ---- coming soon -----
60] ---- coming soon -----

2009©wob
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[Self-Proclaimed Writer]

2009-12-14T00:32:00.000+01:00

Self-proclaimed writer, blamed by the pen,
Became sort of a poet, just to write once again,
Became sort of a human, just to feel life again,
So twitching and turning, he followed his plan.

It was never enough, not for his word,
He yelled and he spoke, but his voice was unheard,
Not all of the wisdoms could come as preferred,
For this self-proclaimed writer to conquer the world.

No sleep and no food, only air to breathe in,
He was trying so hard to show what's within,
It took months and the hours for this to begin,
He believed it is near and he wouldn't bleed in.

This self-proclaimed writer knew it better or so,
Thus he embraced all his pain and sorrow did grow,
To give him the strength that he lost ages ago,
Strength to write once again and to follow the flow.

But never laws of the earth worked for our writer,
He wrote and they burned, restraining him tighter,
He wrote and they threw, never making him brighter
In his intention to grow into more of a fighter.

This one time in his room, while he was alone,
He cried many tears, made his heart into stone,
Making peace with the fact he'll be always unknown,
Making peace with himself and his soul on his own.

Still, never you'd guess if you saw him pass by
That all of his time he's been wondering why
They've never read what he wrote with a sigh,
Why they never knew that he was saying goodbye:

Goodbye to his soul that was burning so bright,
Goodbye to his mind, that was always so right,
Goodbye to this heart he was holding so tight –
Our self-proclaimed writer, that lost his own fight.

2009©wob
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[Breaking Down A Part Of Me]

2009-12-06T19:47:00.000+01:00

It culminates, it integrates
While every pore evaporates,
Won’t hesitate to take this state
Down to where you activate
All the hate you thought was gone,
All the pain you’re bringing on
To break me down, to make me frown
In guilt that comes from all around,
Now it’s formal, like it is normal,
Like my life was paranormal
While you’ve seen the ghost of me
Leftovers of life meant to be
Something great, some other state
Where I wouldn’t culminate
To bring this on when you’re long gone
Where you’re a mock of me alone,
But I rebel straight from the hell
Where I’m sent to live and tell
It stings my skin, brings you back in
I just want out, I won’t step in
I won’t sustain, I’ll break the pain
Just not to feel you here again,
I won’t restrain, I’ll stay insane,
Just not to hear your voice again -

‘Tween now and then I broke the pen
‘Cause I could not ever count to ten,
And it’s haunting season once again,
I ease the heart, release the pain,
I chose this season to break free -
So I’m breaking down a part of me.

2009©wob
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[Strangest Night]

2009-12-02T19:35:00.001+01:00

Strangest night, rainy night,
A lot of dislikes in my sight,
The longest night, holly night,
Full of fear and full of fright;

I’ve cut you off, shut you off,
With Russian Smirnoff on the top,
Still you’re there to fight you off,
With credits bought in horror shop;

You’re not here, you do not fear,
You do not deal with dried up tear,
Common sense brings present tense,
That I can’t use for my defense;

Like I am blind, like I can’t find
Where I’ve lost that brilliant mind,
That questioned you, before I knew
That it’s all getting screwed by you;

Still it haunts and brings the doubts,
All hidden in the rain and clouds,
But it’s December and I remember
All that happened in my surrender;

It isn’t peace, not where I am,
It’s just my life gone day by day,
This strangest night, rainy night
Is bringing back forgotten sight;

This strangest night, longest night
Is one of those I cannot fight,
It’s just not real, it won’t reveal
All the strength I need to heal.

2009©wob
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[Inside (Take It Back)]

2009-11-28T14:53:00.000+01:00

Pedophile inside of you
Raped the child inside of me,
There is nothing they can do,
She can feel what you can’t see,
She can see what you can’t feel,
Her worst nightmare is made real.

Half of man inside of you
Shot the soul inside of me,
There is nothing they can do,
For soul’s eternal, it can't bleed,
Can’t despise what it can’t see,
I lick the wounds to set me free.

Chicken guts inside of you
Spilled the truth all over me,
There is nothing they can do,
They weren’t there, and didn’t hear,
The sound of death and sound of fear,
They didn’t watch you disappear.

Pedophile inside of you
Destroyed the child inside of me,
Nothing for you can they do,
Nothing more then leave you to
Face the age of stillborn youth,
Leave a lie to face the truth.

There was rage inside of you
That was left inside of me,
There was nothing I could do,
You brought it back to set me free,
Now take it back, rage I don’t need,
You take it back, we share no greed.

2009©wob
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[Self-Quoting 41-50]

2009-08-06T01:33:00.005+02:00

41] How deep are my feelings for you? They're six feet deep, baby. Dead and burried.
42] You're always thinking you're better off drinking, but they want you sober for a better tomorrow.
43] I've always had doubts about being a sceptic.
44] I believe in God, 'cause He has doubts in me.
45] It's very simple, I don't look for trouble: I like my men single and my coffee double.
46] Sometimes it takes a man to be a woman.
47] If reasonable doubt was reasonable, then it wouldn't be a doubt.
48] It's not how hard you go. It's how hard you come.
49] I could not make magic, so I've created a trick.
50] When in need for cry in crime, I'd rather waste my time in rhyme

2009©wob
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[One Of Those Times]

2009-08-01T21:35:00.001+02:00

I was holding that bottle so near to my mouth,
Not yet ready to drink it, not ready to shout,
Whether be it a poison or the trick of despair -
It's one of those times you don't even care.

I was holding that blade right in my hand,
Not yet ready to use it, like I'm on demand,
Be it sadness or madness, never I judge -
It's one of those times you're needing a nudge.

I was crying those times without any rhymes,
Not yet ready to amin on all of those crimes,
Be it truth or just lie, I've slowly cut to the chase -
It's one of those times you're using some space.

I was lying to you, and the rest of the world,
Not yet ready to say how much really it hurt,
Be it right or so wrong, it was close to the end -
It's one of those times you're needing a friend.

I am now much better, thanks to the odd,
Not yet ready to pray or ask favors from God,
Be it luck or just faith, I just call it thanksgiving -
It's one of those times you know you are living.

2009©wob
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[Self-Quoting 31-40]

2009-03-18T09:00:00.014+01:00

31] Who said it wasn't cold in a blanket factory?
32] If I got the chance to save the world... I wouldn't.
33] If you always want more, you'll never have enough.
34] Nothing earned - plenty learned.
35] Another day's ahead of you, another dies instead of you.
36] Love isn't a controlled state of mind. It's either a dream or a nightmare.
37] It's not dreams in English that bother me, it's the German subtitles.
38] The one who doesn't look beggar in the eyes is afraid of his destiny.
39] Even if life was just a play, we still wouldn't like the script.
40] Someone said that self-quoting is the lowest form of self-centrism in humanity. I'd like to say it wasn't me.

2009©wob
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[Self-Quoting 21-30]

2009-02-23T11:14:00.011+01:00

21] Don't look for demons, just rip out angel's wings and wait.
22] You can run, you can fight, but in the end you're swallowed by the color of the night.
23] I don't really have a reason to decieve you, but it's the reason I have not to believe you.
24] Your choice is running out of options.
25] If you know your destiny, your destiny is to change it.
26] Don't lecture me. Don't lecture me unless you have a master degree in modern psychiatry.
27] In the world where only bad things are remembered, good ones never happen.
28] All bridge-burners are good swimmers.
29] You don't burn the bridges so you wouldn't go back, you burn them so the evil can't come after you.
30] To make yourself forgiven, you have to forgive the unforgivable.

2009©wob
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[Welcome To Eden]

2009-02-19T17:51:00.003+01:00

Welcome to Eden,
Where fair humans walk with gods
- Now you take an apple.

2009©wob
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[The Reception]

2009-02-10T14:30:00.002+01:00

On the dessert buffet
Two delicious strawberry pies
- Only one fat lady sings.

2009©wob
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[Sleep Searching]

2009-02-10T14:06:00.003+01:00

I'm counting on you
You little sheep lost in the woods
- I need sleep tonight.

2009©wob
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[Rainy Season]

2009-02-10T12:04:00.001+01:00

Grab your umbrella
These trees are hating autumn
- We are two with nature.

2009©wob
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[Social Networks]

2009-02-10T12:02:00.003+01:00

Myspace and Facebook
Beautiful world full of friends
- I'm logging off now.

2009©wob
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[The Book Of Memories]

2009-02-09T17:50:00.009+01:00

"The Book Of Memories" in .PDF format is out!!
Free to download for personal use!

110 pages / 70 pieces-poems
Created with MS Word 2007 and Cute PDF Writer

[Download not available at the moment]
[View my personal author's page]
[Become a fan on Facebook]

No parts of this publication may be sold, reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission of the author.

copyright©2009
all rights reserved

Verica Sirgic
- aka -
s0Nne / Whore Of Babylon

[My Favorite Excuse]

2009-02-07T13:53:00.006+01:00

I can't stop wondering
Just how I would react
If you'd make an offer
That I'm willing to take -
Not that I want it,
Not that I really care...
Not really, indeed,
I'm good with this now,
Don't think that it's greed,
I'm not abusing you (now),
And I'm sure not lying,
It's the innocent thought,
My harmless dreaming,
It's the fun that you brought
By stepping in,
By handling me well,
Those times in the sheets:
You are treating me well...

But I am still wondering
(It's just that little curse)
If we have met earlier
In better times then in worse -
Would you give it a shot?
Would you give it a thought?
Would you pay any attention
Or you wouldn't see me at all?
I know you're hating the tension,
I've already seen it before,
No, you don't need to answer,
It's just one of those days,
That are too heavy and soar...

At least, he's in the past,
And that's what I wanted,
To burn it all in a blast,
Before making him haunted,
But you... You're too sweet,
And everything's just so easy,
How come I'm at your feet?
How the hell did we meet?
Now you rule on my thoughts,
Don't know if it's any good,
But those times that we have,
You know too well that I would
Come to thinking like these,
You have felt it, I know,
And that smile of a tease,
Please don't let it to grow...
Please don't let me to fall:
Tell me that I do know better,
Say that you're not a shelter,
Say just anything, babe...

Can it be good as it is
If we just never cared?
No, I don't dare to think so,
But aren't we both just as scared?
Love just doesn't come easy,
Not after all those defeats,
Romantics are just so cheesy,
And history so full of cheats...

You and me, as it is,
We sure now know better,
To one another these days
We come as good as a flatter,
And it feels just so good,
Never mind what I said,
It's not that I want it,
Of course I don't even care,
So let it be as it is,
A little lust and the tease,
Well, we're doing it well now...

If you think of making that offer,
I'll be bad enough to refuse,
It just isn't our game, baby,
So let's avoid all the blues,
Never say it's a shame:
You're still my favorite excuse...

2009©wob
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[I Almost Have Missed It...]

2009-02-04T20:14:00.004+01:00

Thank you for leaving,
even more for your cursing,
cos reality was there
and I almost have missed it,
and if there wasn't for you,
I most probably could,
I most probably would...

I can't believe it was there,
in front of me all the time,
and this time it's me, babe,
although I can't even rhyme:
I've got him right in my hands,
like it's God's offer for truce -
like even He felt regrets
for meeting someone like you:
you I'm trying to hate,
trying to despise you for pain
for all the mess that you caused,
like someone gave you the rights,
all those rights in the world...
Couldn't I ever convince you?
Can anyone tell you you're wrong?
I kind of feel sorry for you now,
I just thought you should know...

I'm glad you're feeling alone,
don't even ask how I know,
I've always known more then you,
It's what you get when you're left -
all those big pictures to scan,
to search for your own truth
hidden in background of pale,
and pale that's what you were,
your passion for lying to me,
I can see much more now:

Thank you for leaving me be,
thank you for leaving me see,
most of all, thank you
one thousand times I am grateful -
for seeing how stupid I was
for missing everything else,
when it's better to miss you alone...

I won't tell you my feelings,
I know you never have cared -
your deeds proved it to me
everything I ever doubted,
but if you're being jealous -
when you're sleeping alone,
when no-one's waiting for you,
when no-one is there for you -
you have every right to be now,
cos I've got him right by my side,
him and God I believe in,
although religion ain't my thing -

Now I'm embracing myself,
the one you were chasing away,
you've never wanted me, babe,
you were just fooled for a while,
fooling me just the same,
but it's done and I thank you,
I really thank you for that...

Wherever your path leads you,
I won't follow you there,
whoever now dares to approve
everything you've done in last year -
I'm trying not to care for you,
and I so think I'm doing it well,
cos I'm slowly changing back
to that person you first met,
to that person I loved,
to that person you've changed
and then chased her away...

I'm slowly changing it back,
cos I hate what I've become
I hate this person you made,
that existed only for you,
I think it shows I feel better,
now that I'm not thinking of you,
now that I'm not speaking of you,
that I'm having better then you,
I haven't even written about you,
that sadness never existed,
nor did all of that pain,
watch me and how I resisted,
I even managed keeping me sane...

I won't even tell you about him,
you've always known who's my crush,
and yes, I think he's better then you,
and yes you were right on that clue,
after all that you've said and you've done,
well, it seemed like a right thing to do...

And I almost missed it for you...
I can't believe,
I was ready to miss it for you...

To Kidd.

2009©wob
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[Self-Quoting 11-20]

2009-02-04T12:25:00.010+01:00

11] It's our compulsory-obligatory thing: to keep what we are, but be what we're not.
12] Everything begins on Monday. I was born on Tuesday. Guess it says a lot about me.
13] If this life ever had a purpose, my destiny was not to know it.
14] The only reason people fall in love again is because they forget how much it did hurt the last time.
15] Demons of past have left me at last... What do you want, can't you go with the rest?
16] Great minds explode... Hence my migraine?
17] The best of shows have no reruns. That's why I believe in reincarnation.
18] When I drew the line, it ended up in circles.
19] If you're saying I'm suggestive, tell me what I'm suggesting then? Maybe I am.
20] He wanted to know about my past relationships, and then we watched "Planet of the Apes". No particular reason.

2009©wob
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[Self-Quoting 1-10]

2009-02-04T12:11:00.009+01:00

1] Where you are left speechless, I know I have conquered your thoughts.
2] Better tomorrow wouldn't be a tomorrow if it wasn't just a day away.
3] The less I say, the more I am.
4] Don't look for answers where questions aren't asked.
5] Never get what you want? Always want what you get.
6] I made the fat lady sing... And didn't like the sound of it.
7] If life gives you a lemon, lemonade isn't the only solution.
8] Not even voices in my head wanna talk to me no more.
9] Earth is flat sometimes. Jesus chats on MSN. Need I say more?
10] It's the present we're missing while missing the past.

2008©wob
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[I'm Calling No More]

2009-01-04T17:23:00.001+01:00

I've called you last night to say I was dying,
You've sent me to Hell, then said I was lying;

I've called you this morning, to say that I'm dead,
But you just thought that I want to mess with your head;

I've called you today to say I'm going through Hell,
But then you just said how you know I am well;

I'll call you tomorrow, don't know if you'll hear
How much I am calling just for absence of fear;

I'm calling no more, you'll know where I am,
Though postcards don't come from places of damned;

I'm calling no more, I just want to send you a sign,
I wish you the best, baby, in Two-Thousand-Nine.

To Kidd

2009©wob
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[From Where We Are Now - 12.12.2008.]

2008-12-18T11:39:00.004+01:00

From where we are now, we're no longer a pair,
I was looked at by love, and I gave it a stare,
Seven months from today, it was trick or a treat,
But what you're giving me now just equals defeat.

From where I am now, I say nothing I learned,
I just sold my ol' heart and nothing I earned,
Second-handed, but still, it was the only I had,
You shouldn't have broke it, you shouldn't go mad.

From where you are now, you'd say you want out,
You said you don't like the way that I shout,
But that's what I do when I'm feeling the pain,
And that's what I did when you drove me insane.

From where we are now, seven months from today,
I guess my honesty wasn't enough for your play,
You can blame all you want on this ignorant fool,
But I loved you sincerely even when you were cruel.

From where I am now, this day is mocking at me,
Don't know if I'm right or if you would agree,
But we were a good thing in the world of defeat,
I've never once tricked you, my favorite treat.

From where you are now, I'd say you have changed,
I'd say I don't know you and all you've arranged,
But I don't believe it, my heart doesn't know how,
Trick'n'treat were the distance to where we are now.

From where it is now, it really no longer matters,
'Cos love's not the word made out of some letters,
No matter who's wrong, it's seven months from today,
And I'm just sorry we lost it, like cheap movie cliche.

To Kidd

2008©wob
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[I'm Giving You That]

2008-12-03T21:05:00.008+01:00

I could scream loud, but no-one would hear,
I could stand proud, but demons are near,
I can deny all this pain, but it will drive me insane,
I can walk with a cane, but I'll be falling again.

Don't be my friend, it's not a job you can do,
You can't understand, you've got nothing to prove,
Just leave me a while to rhyme and to cry,
I hope it isn't a crime, I do that or I'd die.

Maybe time is a healer, but I'm no believer,
Maybe intentions are good, but Devil's a dealer,
When you gamble with luck, loosing rows are a must,
And that's where I'm stuck, where I'm biting the dust.

I could say I'm okay, but for sure I would lie,
No-one asks you to stay, no-one asks you to sigh,
So go ahead and just leave, don't try to be shy,
I need that moment of peace, stop asking me why.

Maybe I'm just pathetic, maybe I'll never get it,
Maybe it's just for tonight and tomorrow I'll let it,
So whatever it is, just stop asking me, please,
I do my time for a rhyme, I don't see you in this.

Once I'll try to explain and say sorry to all,
I must have been wrong for taking it slow,
I sure have been wrong, you're right to think that,
And if you're right - I am left, well, that you can bet:
So as my final answer to you, I am giving you that.

To Kidd

2008©wob
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[The Image Of Me]

2008-07-04T13:16:00.004+02:00

All mirrors just show the broken image of me:
More stupid and uglier then I wanted to be,
Cracks come over the time, leaving a scar
So deep and so numb, I forgot who you are.

I can sense you are near, you are looking at me,
It's like you always see the right image of me,
Though paint is so rusty and pain goes so real,
You just smile as if I was alive and able to feel.

You're acting like this ain't the true image of me,
You're the reason to think that more I can be,
But you're preaching to skeptic that gave up on faith,
But you're loving the beast that feeds on it's hate.

Whatever I say, you just don't listen to me,
I'm showing you here the only image of me;
Where did I find you? You, holding my hand?
You don't see who I am, you don't understand.

Boycott of my heart, it fights to be on it's own,
But you are so blind for the known and the shown,
You're breaking the silence, you're setting me free,
You know I'm learning to be like your image of me.

To Kidd

2008©wob
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[Water To Water, Ice To Ice]

2008-07-02T13:26:00.004+02:00

I believed in that voice that shouted at me,
That forced me to see all I wanted to be,
It was the voice of unreal, the devil's own dice,
It could turn ice into water and water to ice.

Time has passed slowly, freezing the world,
But I was enchanted with that voice of unheard,
In the back of my mind, it made me think twice
And realize the difference 'tween the water and ice.

No, nature of things never worked on it's own,
Voice became louder from the source never shown,
World became smarter, but still it heated on vice,
So waters came deeper, slowly drowning the ice.

Not even eons of truth gave enough lessons to us,
Punished for freezing, we started melting as thus,
Voice harvested the earth like no human device,
So feared by the water, we were forgetting the ice.

Fire came burning from the depths of the hell,
Taking water from fear, for the souls that we sell,
Taken for granted, world was inflamed for it's vice
And devil's voice was just laughing, billing the price.

These projections of doom told further the truth,
How the world used to burn in the flower of youth,
But that voice vapors from my ears with demise,
Leaving none but the echo of throwing that dice.

Left alone in the silence I'm forced to think twice,
Water always goes to the water and ice to the ice,
But devils know when we're ready for selling the trust
And we're left with "Ashes to ashes and dust to dust".

2008©wob
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[To No-one Special, 'Cos We're No Special At All]

2008-06-28T10:41:00.007+02:00

You make me feel special,
Don't make me feel blue,
You make me feel false
And so ironically true.

Don't try to make me to run,
It's first steps I still learn,
I'll let you know when I'm done,
When I lose and you earn.

I said this time I won't rhyme,
You just play deaf and that's cool,
Words do come special in time
And I'm one more emotional fool.

Yeah, they all tell you the same
And there's no use to repeat,
Love's still none but the game:
You win or you deal with defeat.

And again, we're no special,
Don't let it make you feel blue:
I just rhyme when I'm false,
'Cos it makes me feel true.

To Kidd

2008©wob
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[Haiku]

2008-02-10T12:45:00.003+01:00

1][Rainy Season][2009]
[extract:] - not available for this category -

2][Social Networks][2009]
[extract:] - not available for this category -

3][Sleep Searching][2009]
[extract:] - not available for this category -

4][The Reception][2009]
[extract:] - not available for this category -

[total of pieces: 4]
[last edit: 10/02/09]

[Your Momma]

2007-11-28T17:51:00.000+01:00

Your momma was a groupie girl,
She knew the name of every band,
All concerts, parties in a swirl,
She just lived, she never planned,
Until one day a sorrow came
Knocking boldly at her door,
But she'd never suffer from the tame
'Cos she always wanted more.

Your momma was a drinking girl,
Her rounds would never end,
All cognacs, whiskeys in a swirl,
Every bottle was her friend,
Until one day her glass went dry
And broke to pieces in her hand,
But she'd never let them see her cry
'Cos they wouldn't understand.

Your momma was a poet's girl,
Her writing left the world in awe,
All emotions and words in a swirl,
She was rhyming with no flaw,
Until one day she lost her muse
And her dreams got drowned in ink,
But she'd never give up or refuse
'Cos she knew her ships won't sink.

Your momma was a business girl,
Working hard she knew her skills,
All promotions, colleagues in a swirl,
She fought hard to pay her bills,
Until one day she lost her job
Left with nothing on the street,
But she'd never stop to search the globe
'Cos she knew nothing of defeat.

Your momma was a gambling girl,
She played well, she'd always win,
All cards and dices in a swirl,
Her luck followed from within,
Until one day she lost her chance
To be a person she can stand,
But she'd never quit so in advance
'Cos her life was in her hands.

Your momma was a lot of things,
But she did the best she knew,
She never knew what morning brings,
Yet she kept her points of view,
She knew that life's not what you take
Only from the bottom shelf,
So don't listen to those stories fake:
'Cos your momma was herself.

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Hush]

2007-10-31T21:35:00.000+01:00

Hush, baby, hush, your time is so near,
Angels were singing, couldn't you hear?
That song we'll remember as long as we live,
It's saying that Gods made a choice to forgive.

Hush, baby, hush, I know how you feel,
It's the burden of life, it's rough and so real,
Never forget that I'm here, watching your back,
I hold your hand as a friend, I follow your track.

Hush, baby, hush and you'll wake up the dawn
When this all shall be past and finally gone,
Devils will rest, they can't play you forever,
And you will learn how to see this was all clever.

Hush, baby, hush, life's not made for the weak,
Your luck is inside, it just plays hide and seek,
These days are just cloudy, I'm sure it will shine,
I'll be the first there to help your luck to define.

Hush, baby, hush, I'm not just saying this all,
My heart here believes you're unable to fall,
Don't let it down, please, you need not to rush,
I'm here, going nowhere, just hush, baby, hush.

To Hush

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Simply, It Hurts]

2007-10-31T21:33:00.000+01:00

Simply, it hurts, and I don't want to tell you about it,
Sorrow consumes me whenever I'm thinking about it,
It's not worth any words, so don't you ask me about it,
Don't say how you follow, you know nothing about it.

Simply, it hurts, and I can't even count down the times
I got ran down by pain with the expression of mimes,
It's not worth any feels, so you just don't think about it,
It comes and it happens, you can't do nothing about it.

Simply, it hurts, and that's when I can no longer stand
All those stupid voices that say how they understand,
It's not worth your compassion, don't you ask me about it,
It's just craving for silence, I hate your stories about it.

Simply, it hurts, it feeds with all your ignorant words,
And those things that you say just mount up my hurts,
It's not the time nor the place to prove your devotions,
It's the thing of my own, those are my own emotions.

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Age Of Coincidence | A Story]

2007-10-31T21:27:00.000+01:00

Reality is only an extract of a dream, equal value of sides of imagination that exist by our belief.

- Will is only a part of us that we have invented so we would do something for a reason. - voice of an old man sitting next to me broke the silence.
- What if I do not have the will, does that mean that I don't have myself? Or I just have no will?

I could have sworn that the thing that just hit me on the nose wasn't a little branch but the crumb of the moon's peel. Dried out, burnt down to the half, a sign that this conversation leads somewhere and that something is going on. Annoyed by the view of a mother that treated her crying child with forced discipline witnessed by twenty casual passengers, I lit the last cigarette from the box in my back pocket. This stranger next to me started to squirm, squeezing the metal walking-stick in his left hand.

- Are you afraid of death? - I asked.
- Do I have the reason to be afraid of something that I do not know?
- All of us are afraid of the unknown...
- Fear is the biggest nonsense ever, it's only a tact of human possibilities. - answered the old man contentedly.

Age - the only curse that is inevitable, the only number that, no matter how hard we try to hide it, makes the result of the equation of the great balance in the end.

- If you are persistent in your belief that your place beyond the end is more reserved for you than this one here, you value the unknown too much. - he continued.
- A man learns while he's alive.
- Once I have met an animal with more humanity than all my friends had in them together.
- Maybe you didn't have too many friends in your life.
- And maybe I am only the man who likes to talk to himself and not an intrusive gentleman who asks for a dialog.

I smiled... I have noticed glasses on the wrinkled face got a bit higher and a thought came to me how convenient an old age can be for hiding emotions we cannot hide before we get there. This little man started looking nice to me, even not intrusive, and overall interesting. We give ourselves too often the luxury to be impulsive in our gestures, replies, conversations. He was leading his game, he led it elegantly like a waltz step that I'm sure he knew how to play next to the old record player that nobody makes anymore - somewhere in some old room, next to this park where we were...

- Do you live far from here?
- I do not know. - smiled the old man and I realized that I have become an intrusive one here all of a sudden. Why would he tell me where he lived when we don't know each other for more than this half an hour since I got a cramp in my left leg in the park, half way to my home...?
- For forty years already I always sit on the same bench in this park, every other day of the week.
- It's not bad having some ritual in your life. - I shrugged.
- ...Not once I led the conversation with accidental neighbors in this place. - he smiled, squeezing his walking-stick with both hands, tapping it on the concrete.

I didn't know anything about this old man and it seemed like we set on that bench for the eternity together... Or for those forty years, the time he spent sitting there.

- Life is overrated wisdom of the young. - he spoke again, with that same contented expression on his face.
- World is left for the young to rule it... - sometimes cliche sayings are the best path through the dialog.
- If I asked you why in the world do you feel so old, you would get off of this bench and leave. And I would stay to sit here all on my own. - he continued with kind of a sad tone in his voice.
- I wouldn't leave because of that. - I answered. - I could leave because I need to be somewhere else but here, but I wouldn't leave because of that.
- You never led park-bench conversations before either, have you? - he smiled at me.
- Well, not really...
- Then why are you talking with me?
- I really don't know. Maybe I am afraid of aging and I respect it my entire life, and just maybe this afternoon is simply different then any other afternoon.
- If I told you that this might be the very last ever afternoon in my life, would you know what to say to me?

More than shocked I froze, staring at the concrete in this situation I couldn't find the way out from. For some reason I felt the awful pressure on my chest and the lump in my throat that was coming to choke me.

- Don't take it so hard... - he whispered. - I find this little conversation with you quite pleasant.
- What's your name...? - I asked confused.
- I do not know. - answered the old man in the same tone he told me he didn't know where he lived.

A thought occurred to me - how much this old man reminds me of my sixth grade teacher... My teacher was m.a. in literature and still he was teaching in the elementary school, calling forty of us his own children and treating us as such. When he got annoyed or mad at us, his nose would only go red; he'd always hide the bad side of his character from us children, he'd always control it. My teacher was forever very dear to me...

- You are thinking how much I remind you of a person that was once very dear to you.
- Yes... That's true. You remind me of a very good man.
- You remind me of someone too.
- Yes? Who?
- Of a young man that accidentally set on this bench forty years ago, although he has never done such thing before. He was caught with a strong pain in his left leg and he had to take a rest. - he answered.
- Was that someone you know?
- No, I don't know that young man very well... I forgot about him. But I know he was always curious about a few things I told you today, though he didn't find those things very important on that very day.

I felt a huge need to thank this man, to say anything, but this afternoon's peace got broken by the woman approaching us in a rush, calling this man her father, reminding him what time it is.

- Is this your daughter? - I asked quickly.
- I do not know, I see her for the first time in my life. - he answered with a smile on his face.

A short woman that seemed much older then she probably was, took this old man by his arm not paying any attention to me, starting to drag him away down the path in the park. All the way till sound of the metal walking-stick tapping the concrete didn't fade away from my ears and these two figures didn't get lost from my sight, I was left sitting on that bench. When that burnt-down piece of nature hit me on my nose again, I got up too. Now I could've sworn that was the crumb of the moon's peel, because that round creature was already laughing at me from the sky that was cross-dressing from day to night.

For couple of next days I was walking through that same park, that same path, but never again did I see this strange old man - not on even, nor on odd days of the week. He was gone, he got lost, I only thought how he told me all he had to tell me already, and there was no longer that cosmic need for us to meet each other in this life.

A month later I heard someone's father died... Last days of his life he was often forgetting where he lived and what his name was, who were people who surrounded him, who his family was... He was forgetting everything, but never he forgot to sit on the same bench in the park where he was sitting for the last forty years. Nobody knew the exact reason for this, not doctors, not specialists. They all added that to those strange effects of the old age.

I knew he spent his entire life waiting to tell somebody something he always wished to know. And I was the one to accidentally sit on that bench one afternoon because I got the cramp in my left leg...

The reason is only a part of will that we have invented so we would know how to walk through life and which bench to sit down on so we would get hit in the nose by the crumb of the moon's peel...

Partially inspired by the character from
"Geri's Game", Pixar's animated short movie (1997.)

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[A Reason To Be]

2007-10-31T21:21:00.000+01:00

One million tears are to cry,
One thousand faces to smile,
One hundred prayers are to lie,
Yet few weeks are just for a while.

One million songs are to sing,
One thousand words are to speak,
One hundred sighs are my spring,
Yet time is there only to seek.

One million thoughts and you're near,
One thousand dreams and I'm me,
One hundred calls and you'll hear:
You're my one reason to be.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Sands Of Us]

2007-10-31T21:17:00.000+01:00

I'm still hiding behind the climax of my past,
I'm building up the castle, that won't ever last;
Like a little sand-house, made just for you and me,
Where we can run and hide, where we'll forever be.

I'm still denying all those fights we always fought,
I'm believing strong in the power of the thought;
Like a little break-down, to catch just you and me,
That will reverse it all, that will only let us be.

I'm still calling for all the luck we had and lost,
I'm sometimes thinking it melts with ice and frost;
Like a little season, that's not made to last too long,
It's there to remind us we can't ever feel too strong.

I'm still dreaming, with sugared-poison's taste,
I'm waking up to see another pretty day to waste;
Like a little gap in present, like we exist no more,
Like our castle never was built there on the shore.

I'm still waiting for you, for the perfect hour to come,
I'm losing sands of time, getting dried up in the sun;
Like a little beggar's, my prayers are crying for tomorrow,
Painful, worthless tears feed the angst and fill the sorrow.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Ad Infinitum]

2007-10-31T20:58:00.000+01:00

It's half past forever, it's more than just late
To count down the sin, to test down the faith,
I grab you from notes to tear you outside
From silence you made, from out of my pride.

It's seconds of always that just drive me insane,
How they tick and they tack from out of the rain
Right onto my window, straight into my pain,
They stab their own venom sharp into my brain.

It's all the hours of past that keep crawling back,
Like orphans of hell, they put my mind on the track -
Down that scene of forever, to sail and to drown,
To make the sea out of tears, scream out of a frown.

It's what's left till the end, till the curtain falls down:
To erase all the luck, like it's none but the noun -
Ad Infinitum, my dear, that's how long we will stay,
Bound together in silence, glued together with clay.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Shipping Away From The Bottle]

2007-10-31T20:55:00.000+01:00

Baptized in your tears, I hear the cries of the moon,
I'm just the ship that has sailed from it's bottle away,
I'd like to get back, but sun has escaped to the noon,
I'd like to hear the old ballad, my Soul to portray.

Lost in the open with no shores to hug this damn sea,
I scream but it echoes from the rocks I can't reach,
Salty air burns my eyes and I lose the power to see,
'Till now all my sadness was just a figure of speech.

Where is the horizon now, when I need it the most?
Where is your sweet voice to give the comfort to me?
Compass shows the direction to the Graveyard Of Lost,
Leads me away from my bottle, to Reaper's own plea.

Docks of the Truth are now too far away from my sight,
I leave the wheel of this ship to sleep my way to the night,
Under the blankets in my cabin, I get frozen by fright:
Your voice from the bottle says you found your own light.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[25/03 - All Of My Pain]

2007-10-31T20:49:00.000+01:00

Out in the Moon's shade, alone in the night,
The light of the cigarette's my only light,
Ashes fall down, they get buried in rain,
I won't swallow my pride for all of my pain.

Pretenders, Centurions and all of you lost:
Once life is over, I'll haunt thee as ghost;
Fairies and Witches, all the children of lie:
Feel all my pain, you'll inhale my last sigh.

You tried to bury me, you even requiem wrote,
But I was still breathing with lump in my throat,
I was still crying in this world black and white!
Just a child was I still, drowned in the night.

Cheered you then proudly in all of your fame,
Stealing left-overs of me signed by your name,
To twist them, to turn them right into your own,
But Reaper comes back for what he has sown.

Vengeance is sweet and it's tempted by pain,
I'm strong enough now to break down the chain,
But you're not worth it, although it hurts still,
I'm fighting down sadness with all of my will.

There in the Moon's shade I howl in the night,
I hope you can hear me out in the street-light,
I know you can feel me, in whispers of rain,
It's the scream of my Soul, scream of my pain.

To Certain Someones

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Under My Tongue]

2007-10-31T20:45:00.000+01:00

Just one drop of venom - it's the drug made in hell,
A lie that's mixed in a pill with demon's last spell,
I heard your steps leaving, when angels have sung,
I felt my every vein bleeding, right under my tongue.

Just one pill of hope - it's the cure that shall mend
Last trace of taste of us, and the time we did spend,
It will melt the pepper and honey, choking my lung,
While you lay curled down in sleep, under my tongue.

Just one sting of grace - it's made by angels above,
It's the feeling redeemed by sterile needle of love,
And I shall feel you no more, my soul will grow young,
I'll strangle words swallowed, right under my tongue.

Just the chill and the trill, and I'm falling through lace,
It's the tear made of lava, and it burns down my face -
It shall burn down our home, with all the memories hung,
It shall burn down the pain, right there under my tongue.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[I Once Wrote You A Poem]

2007-10-31T20:40:00.000+01:00

I once wrote you a poem and it came talking to me,
It spoke of all the things we ever wanted to be,
I looked up at the moon and it was leaning to me,
It whispered the words that needed a poem to be.

I wrote you a stanza and it choked my last breath,
But inspiration I had was much stronger than death,
It called for the music and it has brighten the skies,
It brought up the dawn, it has righten your lies.

I once wrote you a poem and it came to it's life,
It cut, made me bleed, so I turned off the light,
There in the dark those words played with my mind,
That poem I wrote, it made me play seek and hide.

I once wrote you a stanza cos you wanted a sign,
You asked me to put your name in a poem of mine,
But it killed me and ghosts have erased every line,
They haunted my paper, stole the pen and the rhyme.

You once asked me to write a poem dedicated to you,
I obeyed and I wrote it and it spoke of nothing but truth,
But it didn't want to go out, it ran away from the world,
That little poem I wrote didn't want to live without you.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Let My Heart Go]

2007-10-31T20:30:00.000+01:00

If you'd just stop haunting my dreams,
If things just got different in means -
I'd just feel like I'm much more alive,
I wouldn't wait for "now" to arrive,
I wouldn't have to learn how to survive.

If I'd just stop hearing your voice,
If you would just give me a choice -
I'd be much better person than now,
Though I'd know not what lovers allow,
Though I'd know just nothing of love.

If you'd erase all the time that we had,
If you'd erase your scent from my bed -
I'd know not my heart you did break,
I'd be able much more now to take,
I'd stop crying, stop dreaming awake.

If you'd just let those words out,
If you'd just learn how to shout -
But no, it hurts as much as it hurts me,
But no, you've always wished us to be,
No... You just feel the same about me.

Are we wiser from where we are now?
Were we that surprised by being in love?
Could you just say it, now after it all,
Could you just listen, or whisper you know
That I really need you - to let my heart go.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Longing]

2007-10-31T20:21:00.000+01:00

I have dreamed and I dreamed, dreaming whole Life away
And You seemed and just seemed so much further away,
But we have grown with each other, born in that same cocoon
From which Love flew away - in which My Heart shall die soon.

Heartless and Painless becomes the ideal of Life that I live,
Just what never I gained, while there was so much to give,
Biting the Apple of Eden was the trigger for this to begin,
Voice of Devil's so strong that it's simply tempting the Sin.

Oh, never I gave Heart to another 'cos I never knew how to give,
But You I loved and Love grew and Love was all that I lived,
You were simply all that I knew, this enchanted fool that I am,
What a sweet girl was I once - now see what your girl just became.

This grown woman, so eager - she just wants to go hunting,
But little girl that you loved - she's still dreaming enchanted,
I am torn in this waiting, this Spirit grows just too large,
I can punish myself, but know that I'm no longer in charge.

And I'm sleeping and sleeping to sleep this Longing away,
I try keeping me sane but My Mind keeps creeping astray,
My palms are sweating the hand that keeps twitching the pen,
My Mind's swollen in Passion and Pain since all this began.

Just come and save me from beast which I am about to become,
Repair my old wings, make me see how I'm just being so dumb,
Just come and save me from this beast... which I have become,
And no respectful woman I am, but just a girl stupid and numb.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Still...]

2007-10-31T20:18:00.000+01:00

Through all the hours of my own day,
I walk through dreams, for you I pray,
I beg the faith, still kneeling down,
O'er image blurred and in the frown.

Still - fading echo takes me down,
Still no escape from this damn town,
You're still a whisper in my heart,
While Cupid misses, playing darts.

Your love so silent, love is still,
Still you I feel, still beg and kneel,
For days to come and take the frown,
For dreaming time, for me to drown.

And this solitude still kills me, slow,
Still - more I love, just less I know,
Still - all this missing makes me ill,
But I shall wait - I need you, still.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Randomness of You And Me]

2007-10-31T20:07:00.000+01:00

To read your own thoughts is to read my own faith,
The moment you smile - my heart is your own estate,
I can't hold the words in nor can I choke all the tears,
I am lost left without you, I am locked down in fears.

Can I be all alone? I just keep asking myself that,
I keep erasing the traces that behind you you left,
But these memories left - they are just out of this world,
They're echoes of emptiness - of the pain and the hurt.

Can I be strong? I just remembered you killing me...
You tried to reject me, but you were just thrilling me,
Your clothes all over the floor - is as far as you got
With all words that got spoken and all that were not.

Can I be a little more wise? I'm so sure that I can't,
Intelligence isn't something right now I can stand,
I have my own truth - you have your own ways,
I keep living the nights, you keep living the days.

So what is left when you erase more than a year...?
When oblivion swallows all you had once for sure...?
I don't feel anything left... I just feel you no more,
I have no more cigarettes left, wanna go to the store?

I look all around me... but you're not here anymore.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Sadness From Within]

2007-10-31T20:01:00.000+01:00

Change of earthly weathers sneaks into my mind,
I stay away from windows, stay away from time,
I rewind your voice all over, words wrapped up in sin,
I walk the clouded path, follow Sadness from Within.

Your divine smile echoes in the darkness of my halls,
I close my eyes to dream of shadowed part of Soul's,
And the Orchestra of Macabre plays the solo violin,
I embrace what's left of us, the Sadness from Within.

Freezing tears start falling down frown of my face,
While I'm still lost and haunted in this forgotten space,
By all we said and done, by all we could have been,
I cry for Angel's grace to take the Sadness from Within.

Silence stays unbroken, all words still hide unspoken,
But Heart shivers through the torso to leave all outspoken,
Soul fights for Heavens Lost, ripping light from the unseen,
Reaching for it's powers to kill the Sadness from Within.

Vision blurred with pain shows no Earth's salvation,
Body caught in vain won't resist just such temptation,
Soul breaks down in your shadow, drugged by caffeine,
And it surrenders to the loss, to the Sadness from Within.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[No, I Am Not Mad]

2007-10-31T19:54:00.000+01:00

No, I am not mad at you, I'm not angry at all,
You might've deserved it, but I just don't know,
Was it that hard to give just one nice word?
Was it too hard to be quite, at least unheard?

No, I am not mad, I'm just drowning in pain,
I look at the sky - sun shines over the rain,
See - it's my sign upthere, it's all that I need,
Is it hard to fake smile through all of that greed?

Don't give me that look, don't yell in my face,
I have no more voice left for you and your race,
I'll probably go - to hit my fists off that wall,
But was it that hard to smile through this all?

Don't you dare to call me again all of those names,
I know who I am, I don't deserve all your flames,
I am so proud of myself, why shouldn't I be?
I just needed you here, how couldn't you see?

No, I am not mad... I know this feeling too well,
Sadness it's called, and you just sent me to Hell;
You mock at my tears, you step on my Soul,
I'm supposed to be happy... didn't you know?

I needed a shelter - you only gave me the pain,
I needed support - you just drove me insane,
They give me degrees - they give me promotions,
You act like I don't exist... there are no emotions.

To My Mother

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[This Afternoon I Called You]

2007-10-31T19:50:00.000+01:00

This afternoon I rang the number I thought was lost,
Reality did stumble right upon the Love's own cost,
You sneaked into my nightmare and I couldn't hear your voice -
My fears have grabbed the daylight, I just had no choice.

This afternoon I called you, just to hear you breathe,
My mind has thought of scene, you sneaked out from between -
I even stared at written words, whispering to the wall,
But when I heard your answer - I fell into Rabbit's Hole.

This afternoon I rang you, had to hear you through the wire -
All Devils played with me, but you sounded just so tired...
Did I step into sweet dreams? Did I wake you from the sleep?
Your breathing was too short, your voice severe and deep...

This afternoon I called you, in tears I rang and ran,
I can't talk to you in person, but to call - just that I can;
I can't listen to the music, those words are so sung up -
I wanted just to hear you - I'm so sorry I hung up.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Rome]

2007-10-31T19:47:00.000+01:00

No, Rome wasn't built for a day,
But fell into myth, forever to stay;

No, Rome never was like other towns were,
But History made it immortal for sure;

No, Rome wasn't much different from Thee,
Both bigger than Life, both Legends to be;

No, Rome was never much greater than You,
Yet it had your Black Soul and you both never knew;

No, Centurion's never what I wanted to be,
But - "Rome to Caesar - this to me...?"

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[You Said]

2007-10-31T19:45:00.000+01:00

You said how I can't see -
then be me blind;
You said you need to be -
then let me hide;
You said how I don't feel -
yet I'm here dying;
You said that I will heal -
well, you were lying.

Be me healed -
still scars are deep;
Oh, don't I feel -
I cry and weep;
Be you yourself -
that I can stand;
Be me blind -
I see the end...

I believe I'm blind -
cos no peace I find..
I think you're lost -
you're my past's ghost...
I can't stand much more -
it breaks my core...
It just won't heal -
I guess I...
Feel.

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[I Know You]

2007-10-31T19:41:00.000+01:00

You're preaching
of my life,
I'm reaching
for my knife,
You don't know
just how much,
I can show
for one touch...

You're lying
just this time,
I'm crying,
my tears rhyme,
You don't see
I need you,
You love me,
I read you...

You're going,
I'll follow,
Not knowing
love hollow,
You want me,
I know you,
I'll haunt thee
to show you...

You're preaching,
you know none,
I'm reaching
for my Sun
My hands want
to hold you,
Just say, don't
I know you...?

To Caesar

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Wine Seraph]

2007-10-30T14:26:00.000+01:00

After-hours come, we're closed for all bar flies,
I polish and shelve down all of today's lies -
Lights are long extinguished and wine seraph sings,
She comes in silence after all of those bad things.

Wilderness of wine starts running in my veins,
Sweet harp melody breaks through all the chains -
Life comes softer laid on the vinyl of that bar,
Was I thinking of her - or just of what we are.

Vineyard miles with sweet aroma and odor,
Never was I wise, but my wine is always sour -
Caught up in the vines, I'm not the one who chokes,
Caught up in the night, wine just my mind provokes.

But sweet is just her harp and melody just sweeter,
Seraph sings the night and late hours are the meter
Of our unknown friendship, glasses and wild wine,
Of the morning after... of the touch of the divine.

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Split]

2007-10-30T14:12:00.000+01:00

Waking up, late afternoon
With bad taste inside cocoon
I wash my face from salty tears,
I stretch my soul, rip out the feels.

Dream shattered lays upon my bed,
I watch one sleeping, watch one sad:
Did I split this soul in two?
Did I miss it... was it You?

She's split and blind, she's still sleeping,
She's left behind, in dreams she's weeping,
I reach for pen, for words alone,
Before she's numb, before she's stone.

Split in half, soul ripped in two:
Half still lives, and half dies through;
I kiss the pain and what remained,
I leave her dreams, I go insaned.

This half I am - it has to leave,
This half has life it needs to live;
The other one, still just too weak's,
It needs to dream of love it seeks.

Someday both halves will turn to one,
I'll break the silence, find the sun;
But, for now, it stays this way,
Don't say both have to live today.

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Sealed By The Screams]

2007-10-30T14:02:00.000+01:00

How could you lie I mean nothing to you?
How could you lie there's nothing to do?
How could you watch me crying all night?
How could you sleep with my heart by your side?

(How could you sleep with me by your side...?)

You pulled me from window in that very same night,
I wanted to jump, so you could feel you're so right -
You took the knife straight away from my hands,
I wanted to show you you run in my veins -

(I just wanted to show you you in my veins...)

I was screaming at you, just so you could hear
I hit you and hurt you, just so you could feel
How much I need you, and how much I bleed
And how much I'm worth for all that I need -

(How much you're worth and how much I need...)

I was trying to say that all that I'd miss,
I was trying to chain every moment of bliss -
I was trying to change you, unaware of your lie,
Unaware you are saying for me you would die -

(Hearing you screaming for me you could die...)

That night left behind is left sealed by the screams,
Words are said and all done and buried by dreams -
None of us slept - we were echoed by fright,
I held to my tears - you held me that night...

(You wiped down my tears - you held me whole night...)

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[My Beautiful Sunday]

2007-10-30T13:59:00.000+01:00

Oh, my beautiful, beautiful Sunday,
You have never been like the regular day -
Never the good day, never you're my day,
Never reached I my peace for that one day.

Oh, my beautiful, beautiful Sunday,
Never the sun has shined into your way -
Never the right way, never on that day,
Never I needed to say you are my day.

Oh, my beautiful, beautiful Sunday,
Never enjoyed I the rising of your day -
We have never been closer, but need I to say,
How much I need my peace for that one day.

Oh, my beautiful, beautiful Sunday,
Ending of my week, ending is your way -
Never you're gentle and never you're my way,
You never surprise me, never you're my day.

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Pinned]

2007-10-30T13:53:00.000+01:00

I am grabbing this pin with the scar on my hand,
I am trying to pull the trick of my stand,
Not even the wise ones know what mapping can do
When you map your emotions deep in critical due -

It's sadness that calls and darkness that shows,
Under the steps choked in the screams of the falls;
You pin bleeding core - you pin with much more,
Lets pin it, let's map it - We feel like never before -

Never forget it, never regret it - together we'll map it:
Signed by lost children of love who are right here and at it -
We came from same womb - given birth by same feel,
We are mapped like emotions and we die as we heal.

Our lives go deeper in stone like land after erosions,
We are lost children of love - pinned by emotions.

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Missing...]

2007-10-30T13:48:00.000+01:00

Dark is the night and sorrow so deep,
Cold are the pillows that drown in my weep,
Empty the bed where we used to sleep,
Empty the Soul that so hard is to keep.

I can hear all the wolves calling the moon,
But scared I'm no more - I'll dream of you soon,
But, frightened I'm more by this sorrowful hole,
That's supposed to be bed and to swallow me whole.

Far is the dawn and so close is the mourn,
I can feel you are restless, but never you've shown,
Never you'd let these words pass my lips,
Never you'd let me sail down in these ships.

If you could just see how quite I am -
If you could just feel how silent I am -
And this silence is killing when I know you can't sleep,
And you know how I miss you, and love you too deep.

Your scent is still here and it's filling the night,
Your hands are around me, but not you in my sight,
I am hurrying the faith, I am grabbing it fast -
It's the present we're missing while missing the past.

I am turning the clock, I am speeding the time,
This is my scream too and not just my rhyme,
I won't let this to happen, I won't let us in blast -
It's the present we're missing while missing the past.

(I Miss You, My Love...)

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rghts reserved

[Maybe]

2007-10-30T13:43:00.000+01:00

Maybe I need nice word or two,
Maybe I need my own world -
So don't you act like I'm not here,
Don't you do that while I'm near.

Maybe I need time on my own,
Maybe I'm not made of stone -
So don't you say I haven't grown,
Don't you speak like me you own.

Maybe I'll cry if you slap my face,
Maybe I need small trace of grace -
So don't you act like you don't hear,
Don't you do that while I'm here.

Maybe I need this day today,
Maybe I'll try to do it my way -
So don't you act like you can't see,
All things I need - I need to be.

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[To Riddler]

2007-10-30T13:28:00.000+01:00

I asked you once how to stop the tears,
I was blinded, locked away in fears,
You were near – you could almost hear me cry,
They broke my wings – they left me there to die.

I cried for help when no-one was around,
When voices vapored in echo of lost sound,
But you were there – to whisper to my Soul
Words of comfort – when there was none at all.

I've lost my all in that bitter fight,
In thousand voices that laughed into my light,
You found and saved me right from reaper's scythe
You were my sanctuary in that unholy night.

All I asked you was how to stop the tears,
But you listened with heart instead of ears
- You looked into my Soul, saying all right things:
That we're no Angels - and we don't need no wings.

To Riddler

2005©wob
all rights reserved

[Only Because]

2007-10-30T13:20:00.000+01:00

Only because you left me there standing
- Don't think that still standing I am,

Only because you taught me pretending
- Don't think that still pretending I can,

Only because you kept being offending
- Don't think that still now I am the same,

Only because you became more demanding
- Don't think that I don't suffer the shame,

Only because still it's degrading
- Don't think that I can see it's the game,

And only because you feel outstanding
- Don't think that I can feel the same.

To The Biggest Pretender

2005©wob
all rights reserved

[Just Rewind It]

2007-10-30T13:15:00.001+01:00

Would you just rewind it for a sec,
It's my album that's in - it is my track,
Just play that one just once again -
Listen and think over if I was insane.

Just rewind it, let go on the pause,
It's hidden in-there in the rhythm we lost,
Just play it again and let it go on,
Listen once more and you can move on.

Just rewind it, move close to the speaker,
It was even before you left me to pick her,
Just do it once more, just do me a favor:

Listen and swear you've forgotten my flavor,
Listen and dare to call me a failure,
Listen - it's there, what I felt for the past year.

Listen... It lifts me when I'm feeling unsure,
Listen... It's easy when you are going for sure,
Listen... I'm sorry that I'm nothing like her.

Just rewind it...
You'll find it...
Listen.

To The Biggest Pretender

2005©wob
all rights reserved

[It's Been A While, It's Been A Year]

2007-10-30T13:06:00.000+01:00

It's been a while, it's been a year,
And deeper than Nile, a feeling unsure –

It's bigger than Life, it's endless at Night,
But bitter's the Strife, and restless the Fight –
"When memories kill – the sound is so still,
And Pain grows for real in Heart made of steel" –
The Heart I did seal, but wounds never heal,
And I pray and I kneel, and still You're so real;
It was Fume of Divine, I could see myself shine,
And still I combine every rhyme into sign,
And if I even decline that feeling so mine
Not the river of wine could banish all thine
- 'Cos You reached in too deep, to stay in for sure,
Got deeper than Nile, through Lie and the Lure
- Stayed just for a while, and left for a year.

It's been a while, it's been a year –
(I've been running for miles) from feeling unsure.

To The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[Red Moon Tonight]

2007-10-30T12:59:00.000+01:00

"...Demons of Past have left me at last,
What do you want...?
Can't you go with the rest...?"

The moon tonight was colored red,
Once when full – I felt like scared;
What I'm trying's what you said:
Once we meet – to you I'm dead.

The moon tonight was what you are,
Once I saw it – I couldn't go by;
What red's blood's of hidden scar:
Once this moon knew who was I.

The moon tonight was vain like you,
Once ignored-I well-known truth,
And what stars could – I might've, too:
Once called "Poet", now I'm mute.

The moon tonight was colored red,
Once the night called out for dead,
What once felt was never said:
Once had dream's lost in your bed.

The sun of morning'll hide the red,
The new beginnings, new life led :
What once "Moon" was – will be dead;
What once "I" was – still be dead.

To The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[No Need]

2007-10-30T12:57:00.000+01:00

There's no need for this poem -
There's no need for this lie -
Cursed to see you all over again,
My Heart's preparing to die;

No, there's no need for this poem -
There's no need to ask why -
My Heart is burned down to nothing,
My weeps all silenced to sigh;

There's no need for this poem -
There's no need to be kind -
I already hear the funeral bells:

Ashes to Ashes -
One Heart has just died.

To The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[Meaning]

2007-10-30T12:47:00.000+01:00

I can see Past is leaving, dragging it's tail,
All the months and the hours - they drag as a snail,
I'm feeling so down - as down as can be:
It's all passing by, meaning nothing to me;
Though nothing to you - even less is to me,
Means something to ones we've forgotten to be.

I can see Present smiling, from far far-away,
These freaking Ghosts - they're intending to stay,
But could I care less - and the least that can be:
Their tellings and spellings mean nothing to me;
Though none your concern is - even less is to me,
Maybe means something to ones we thought we could be.

I can feel Future coming, right here in my face,
What's left of the Past and the Present is leaving no trace,
Not hoping for better - is the best that can be:
Whatever will happen means nothing to me;
Though nothing to you - still means something to me,
Means something to ones I wished we could be.

To The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[If]

2007-10-29T18:44:00.000+01:00

Bad rhymes on paper tonight I'd burn
If you'd just look back, if you'd return –

You could walk down through that alley,
I'd look for words, you'd say just "Shall we?"
And we'd both know Past's forgiven,
What once was taken'd be re-given;
- It'd be so nice to smile once more,
You'd come and say "I'm mad no more."
I'd cry, but would be sad no more,
I'd forget bad things you've said before;

- If you could walk down through that alley,
If you just smiled and said just "Shall we?".

To The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[I Shiver, I Cry]

2007-10-29T18:40:00.000+01:00

I bury myself in my work, in my books,
Whispers I hear from the Demons of Lie:
"Set one tear, now nobody looks!"
I set it, I hold it; I shiver, I cry...

Surrender comes last in making Life true,
I've dreamed, it turned nice, I thought it goes by,
And surely it would if I found a way through,
But, instead, now in Silence, I shiver, I cry...

"I'm lonely" are words that never I'd say,
They are glued to my tongue with the terror of Lies;
In my deep paper tomb I go now to lay,
To sleep or to die, while I shiver, I cry...

Silence's around me, all people go by me,
This town is the audience for the loneliest sigh,
Silence's the Judge, the one to assign me
To the sentence of echo of "I shiver, I cry"...

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[How Surprising]

2007-10-29T18:36:00.000+01:00

How surprising - it excites me:
Role of masked-one, secret watcher
In all the Silence that still bites me,
In the damage of your torture.

How it's awkward - you don't know me:
Secret guest in secret chambers,
You could swear before you saw me
That I'm the one that still remembers.

How much different it can shock me:
Secret keeper, midnight walker
In this town where you have locked me,
In your dreams where I'm the stalker.

How it's still strange - you deny me:
Secret Life led, secret Sin made
With so little you did buy me,
But from this one I just can't fade.

How I see it - you still are well,
Secret truth is - I'm not half that,
Can't you see me - though you can't tell,
Can't you whisper what ain't said yet...?

To The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[To The Greatest Pretender]

2007-10-29T18:29:00.000+01:00

In Dead Hour thinking of You,
Like thief stealing memories of You
(From my Senses, where it's all You)
Whispering words I once have told You:

My no Poem's speaking of You,
And no God will stand above You,
And no Man will know I saw You,
And no Soul like mine will know You,
And no Thing on Earth I'll owe You,
And no Feeling I will show You;

By Your Name last time I call You -
Through the whisper, 'cos it's all You -
Through same whisper Soul surrenders:
You're the Greatest of all Pretenders.

To The Biggest Pretender

2003©wob
all rights reserved

[Velvet Fog]

2007-10-29T18:20:00.000+01:00

Velvet Fog has filled the room,
Black walls spelling words of Doom -

Every language's learned to speak
Only Truth's now left to seek -

I have no rhymes, I have no will
All my knowledge words are still -

It's the Dead-End, not the Road
This Life's purpose - simple fraud -

Through thorns barefoot - to keep the Soul:
Still - Velvet Fog will cover all...

2002©wob
all rights reserved

[For All This Time]

2007-06-16T20:48:00.000+02:00

All this time I still can't reach
For days to be, that's meant to be,
All past days just burn and itch
For ways to me – they're sent to me.

It's my mind that's faking up
-I write standing up, I'm smoking up,
My name's way back for making up:
It's words recalled of breaking up.

All this time I never reached
For Sanity that's mine to be,
All those days are way too stitched
For brain in me – all yours in me.

It's me who's cursed to bring you up
-I'm loosing it, and it comes up,
No need for Durst to fix you up:
You're breaking up – I'm breaking stuff!

For all that time you thought I'm done
With habits past you found were strange,
But for all that time I'd run, and none
Of memories bad did ever change.

It's me and mine that's blowing up
-I took the shame, you took the fame,
I'm sick and tired of showing up:
You know my name – it's me you blame.

To The Biggest Pretender

2005©wob
all rights reserved

[Fear Of Heights]

2007-06-16T20:43:00.000+02:00

You are reaching toward my Soul,
You ask of me to give it so whole,
You lift me up beyond the twilights,
But you can't feel my fear of heights.

You so want me to start to love you,
You so put my all above you,
You take my hand to take me your way,
But can't you see I can't go that way.

You're so eager to take my all,
You can catch me whene'er I fall,
You rule my Heart, my pen and rhymes,
But can't you see I'm "me" sometimes...?

Now you back out from all I say -
Now you will tell I went astray -
Now you're no more near my sights -
Now I'm dealing my fear of heights.

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Dead Like Me]

2007-06-16T20:42:00.000+02:00

Walking down the lonely street -
No-one hears the steps beneath -
It's the one you call the sadness,
Caught in world of solemn madness.

I'm walking lonely miles whenever -
I'll think whatever of just whoever -
I'm the one that you can't see,
Searching for those dead like me.

I'm walking in the shoes of dead -
Wherever this quest ever led -
It's the road that's spread with thorns
Echoed by my cries and mourns.

I'm walking down the lonely block
With keys to only poet's lock -
You might sense, but you can't see
It's not bad being dead like me.

Walk with me, just for tonight -
No need for fright of lonely sight -
It's the world not all can see -
Of those dead - like you and me.

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Dancing With Demian]

2007-06-16T20:40:00.000+02:00

My swans all in mud,
In flood of the blood,
All my tulips in spud
- I'm dancing with Demian.

My kingdom is dying,
All truths came up lying,
All angels went sighing
- I'm dancing with Demian.

My dragons are jailed,
All my principles failed,
Poison clouds all inhaled
- I'm dancing with Demian.

My lovers found others,
Sons are forgetting their mothers,
Of world nobody bothers
- I'm dancing with Demian.

And all I remember
Is meeting The Biggest Pretender,
He spelled prophecy tender:
- "Dancing with Demian."

My Soul is wide open,
Hearing words all unspoken,
Dying slowly heart-broken
- Dancing with Demian…

To The Biggest Pretender

2003©wob
all rights reserved

[Burned-Down Field]

2007-06-16T20:38:00.000+02:00

Insaned by the amount of weed -
I burn-down one more love's field,
One more is going with this snow
It comes falling over hurts
Sinking deep in flood of words...

...Choking in the flood of words -
Fire lets me down, and silence hurts,
It stings below, deep in the snow
It burns the skin, it lets the flow
Of sorrowed mind, of love I know...

...Sorrowed mind and love I know -
Both won't let me just to show,
How I need and how I bleed
How lost touch is burned in weed
How I cry in burned-down field...

...I cry, I bleed in burned-down field -
Under snow shut down and sealed,
With my wishes, filled with sorrow,
With love lost with no tomorrow
Your voice from memory now I borrow...

...Borrowed voice from memory sings -
It's you I look for in all these things,
You and Sun - it's all I need
To melt the snow from burned-down field
And set free the love down sealed...

...When set free the love will flee -
Come and hold me, and you'll see,
Come and hold my tears and cries
I promise I'll forget the dreadful lies
I promise I'll become more wise...

...Look - our love - it wants to fly,
Look - this field - it won't have weed,
Look - it's me - it's my last sigh,
Look - it's us - it's all we need...
Look - it's love - this burned-down field.

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Broken Mirror]

2007-06-16T20:37:00.000+02:00

Through the fog I see the window
Open up, and someone watching -
She is crying, I'm approaching,
Hand reaches in and my hand bleeds -
It's words unwritten my mind reads,
Broken glass and solemn letters -
She falls down and her soul shatters,
Piercing deep inside my feet -
I feel the sorrow, pain beneath...

Fog goes away... It's not the window -
It's my reflection, my broken mirror.

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Black Friday]

2007-06-16T20:35:00.000+02:00

Black Friday,
Black, my day
Black words say
Black - my way.

Black you are,
Black, this night
Black too far
Black - is right.

Black ships wreck
Black shores by,
My soul black
Black - your lie.

Black bell rings,
Black all day
Black all things
- Black Friday.

2003©wob
all rights reserved

[Bitter One You Are | Unforgiven]

2007-06-16T20:33:00.000+02:00

Yes I've grown, yes I've shown
That myself I own -
I came back, I'll go now
You have gained somehow
That I hate - what I am -
And such bitter one you are
What a waste, ghastly past
That happiness don't last -
Yes I've grown, yes you've shown
That this I'll never own...

Yes I went, straight to hell
You were only wishing well -
I came back, I'll go now
Your words do teach somehow
What I hate - what you are -
And a bitter one you are
What a shame, what I am
Your pride's my only aim -
Yes I went, straight to hell
You're the one to put me there...

Yes I know, yes you've shown
That my heart's forever gone -
I came back, I shouldn't have
Damned shouldn't return from hell
And I hate - what we are -
But such a bitter one you are
What a game, what a shame
We're still written by same name -
Yes I know, yes you've shown
Now be forever gone...

Yes I know, yes you've shown
Now leave my heart alone...
(...And I'll dub thee Unforgiven.)

To My Mother,
Inspired by Metallica's "Unforgiven"

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[All Bridges]

2007-06-16T20:30:00.000+02:00

All bridges in flame,
Feel I the shame?
This ain't that game,
That ain't my name.

All bridges fell down,
Cutting the town,
Judging the Crown,
Stripping the gown.

All bridges in dark,
Shutting the spark,
Sinking the Ark,
Leaving no mark.

All bridges - My Past,
I buried it fast,
I left it in blast...

I'm now living the rest,
I now hope for the best.

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[You Were]

2007-06-16T20:23:00.000+02:00

You were my child, my love, my wild-
The one with shelter in to hide,
Yet one far, that's gone away
Through all those distant fields I stray.

You were my all I never said-
Not just one to take to bed,
And never one that should be gone
Drowned by dreams in which I moan.

You were my end and my rebirth-
The one I never wished to hurt,
Yet spell kept it's twisting faith
To play us both, to teach us hate.

You were just all I'm scared to say-
The one to lead me all the way,
And not the one to leave and bleed
Not one to fade in Devil's greed.

In your arms my tears did shine-
Even through the all bad rhyme,
More than once you made me stun',
More than truth you were The One.

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[What's]

2007-06-16T20:21:00.000+02:00

What's the world if we can't have it-
What are words if we can't tell it-
What is life when no-one's living-
What's the gift if no-one's giving-
And what is gene if we can't pass it-
And what's the peace if we can stress it-
So what's the love if we don't feel it-
So what is pain if we can heal it-
And what are we if have no shadow-
And what is life without the ado-
What's the poet with no rhymes-
And what the sun without it's shines-

It's what I'm without your presence,
It's what mine's without it's essence.

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[The Poet Sanctuary]

2007-06-16T20:19:00.000+02:00

Wandering lost through darkest wood
With by my side just rhymes and sighs
With time and life I solemn stood
Choked and stunned by common lies.

No thing I missed but human touch -
All nature's beauty could not bring such -
And solemn nights by fire became
Inspired by hell and Soul untamed.

Under my steps evil nested
Under my heart sorrow still
Followed by the ghosts I rested
Beyond my faith, against my will.

By that time my mind has strayed
By that time - Soul's been away
So I have just for peace now prayed
To find the bed where I can stay...

And Heavens opened with bright shine
Lightening way in language rhymed
It showed me more than just one sign
That on this Earth my home I'll find.

From straight trees the nature broke
A little field of dreams and hopes
A life-breath for one that choked
A small cottage on land's slopes.

With smile that place my face has blessed
My rhymes, my children cheered in awe
All my dreams now felt caressed
Walking through wide open door.

For all confessions found was ear -
For all I was the place to be -
Fear-proof west for every fear -
For tired Soul the rest to see.

If you ever cross that woods -
Through which I've walked and gotten lost -
To look for this, you know you should
There will take you every Poet's ghost.

To My Dearest Online Forum:
The Poet Sanctuary

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[The Map]

2007-06-16T20:17:00.000+02:00

I used to treasure my heart, used to treasure my soul -
You came so afraid that I would give you them whole -
But I wasn't prepared to open myself just as wide,
I turned my back on you, I had something to hide.

As I laid on those sheets that have tasted that night
You said I'm a dreamer, and you aren't the black knight
But it was just silly, and I convinced you you're wrong
Then you drew me the map that I will cherish for long.

I was feeling a dream, it wanted to consume you and me
Wanted to swallow the light, stop me from seeing what I see -
It almost took over the night to erase that map from my back
But you showed me what's real, you put me back on the track.

We were mostly just friends who always wanted to play
That wicked game of this life in whose rhythm we sway -
Me just too sad to feel loved, you just too crazy to feel,
But maybe we left it to silence, maybe we were just real.

I know we are drawn apart by the length of that road
That stands in between us, and that distance's too odd -
But that map on my back - I believe will show me the way
Now I know why you drew it - maybe next time I'll stay.

To Aaron

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[The Heavy Piano]

2007-06-16T20:15:00.000+02:00

There stands the heavy piano, deep in the black of my mind,
Under the dust and the dark where I'm trying papers to find,
'Cos it plays the music of my dream, that is signed by your hand
Rhythm of lover's own dance, one played under our command.

It makes me want to reach for you, makes me drag you inside
Of this beautiful darkness, where we can play seek and hide -
To feed each other with cherries, with brown sugar and cream,
Where we can feel safe, where dark wings carry this dream.

There stands the heavy piano, under spider-webs and the dust,
It's strings are silent for long, but you can help clean up the rust -
Just take my hand gently, close your eyes and join me in dream,
Make it the bed made of petals, sweet like cherries and cream.

You'll always be the Black Knight that once my poem has made,
Inspired by Shakespeare and Poe, dressed in armor of shade -
The Moon has brought you to me, I heard your howls in night
I have embraced all your pain, you chased away all my fright.

There stands the heavy piano, where I got crushed by the fear -
You watched my longing from shadows, to whisper it into my ear,
Now I'm close to give you my heart, if you'd just offer your own -
'Cos these paths that we dance - they lead straight to unknown.

To Aaron

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Smile]

2007-06-16T20:13:00.000+02:00

The Sun is shining from my eyes,
I'm broken and ran down by lies;
But, still, I raise my head up high:

I smile to Gods while passing by -
I smile to Friends who know my role -
I smile to Nature's Heart and Soul -

But most of all - I smile to Thee
Through all the Strifes that You can't see,
Most of all - through tears and sighs,
So You could see Sun in my eyes.

Sonne.

2002©wob
all rights reserved

[Significance Of The Dream]

2007-06-16T20:12:00.000+02:00

While the clock ticks it's way through the silence of night
Your breathing becomes so loud in my sight -
Calling my dreams for the battle of mourns
Pulling my Soul through to the waking of dawn -

You sneak to my bed, caressing my dream
You keep my eyes closed so I can see what I see
Your hands follow the map tattooed on my Soul
You wake up the dead, then take over me whole -

Unleashing the lizards to crawl down on my spine
You tease my delight until I give you the sign -
Until I moan and I groan begging for more
Until I am stoned from all the sighs that you stole -

Harshness and passions revive me from Sorrow
How dead was I really till these moments you borrowed?
One tick of the clock - and the depth is unlocked
Accepting you in where you belong with your stock -

You ride on my dreams and your way through the night
All the minutes and hours run away from our sight
Sigh after sigh - battling Light and Delight
We play our own game in the rhythm of night -

And just like before, you don't leave me on shore
Of that ocean we sail through, but you hold to my core
Holding it tight so I don't get swallowed by night
Holding heat just so close so I don't escape from delight -

Your tired lips sealing every inch of my skin
Is what I remember when someone mentions The Sin
Play of your hands running down through my hair
Is what comes to my mind when I fall to Despair -

You lift me to Heavens when you can't and you can
You make me your Soul-Mate and most affectionate fan -
You help me survive all the past and the strife
You're the most significant part of My Dreams and My Life.

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[My Muse]

2007-06-16T20:09:00.000+02:00

Just another lazy Sunday afternoon
Coffee colder then that winter's noon -
Cream melted down the silver spoon
Drowning my frown in the Tune.

There She was - in all her beauty
Red hair falling down her spine -
Fellas passed by, called her "Cutey"
But She was more - she was Divine.

"My dreamed Muse, she really lives!" -
Thoughts that marked that winter day
Feeling that my simple faith fulfills,
Words ever needless are to say...

Reached I hand for sugared dice
For canvas that would paint her Soul
My coffee bitter, but still so nice
Though Spirit restless wanted more.

Chit-chat on useless, daily matters
I watched her lips, her soft pale skin
Knew she then that my heart shatters
Knew she ever she's my Soul's twin...?

These days all fellas take my place
She rules them all, She's got her style
But this girl here once touched her face
This girl was closer for a little while.

You'd ask what happened, you want more?
But no, My Friends, I'll just stop here -
Real Love's more sexless than you know -
And no choice you've got when it is near.

To D.

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Lovely, Lustful Aaron]

2007-06-16T20:07:00.000+02:00

Lovely, lustful Aaron, you, the darkest knight of all,
Break my knees with passion and watch me as I fall -
Make me beg for mercy, make me object of your lust
Sing words of terror to me, stab me with your trust.

Lovely Aaron, beauty higher of all men dead, alive!
Knight and thief in one - Satan's servant now revived -
All goodness falls undone, right there, at your feet
With your words you hunt - with your rage you treat.

Lovely, lustful Aaron - wished I only you to humbly serve,
Simple maiden made of flesh, while Goddess you deserve -
While Gods fall in front of you their spells just to preserve,
While Angels sell their wings just for pleasure to observe.

Lovely, lovely Aaron, dressed in armor made of Night
Knew you ever girl who fell for longer then first sight?
Your bed, the lustful dome - your pillow made for many,
But knew you ever Love - or for all you had just plenty?

Lovely, lustful Aaron, you, the darkest knight of all,
My knees don't shiver for you, you won't ever see me fall -
I'll make you beg for mercy, make you object of my lust
Just keep singing those words to me and later we'll discuss.

To Aaron

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Letter Unwritten / Before I Come]

2007-06-16T20:05:00.001+02:00

This is the letter unwritten, to be sealed by the time -
Many I've written before just to break them in rhyme -
These words not-to-get-sent are referring to you,
Before I come in a day, you should get this one too.

You know who I am, you'll also know why I came
You know I'll try very hard not to drive you insane -
One thousand wounds that I have - they all left me a scar
I know you have some of your own, I know who you are.

I am twitching my pen, because I am trying to promise
We'll forget we got hurt by those two persons we miss -
I'm thinking that we've been through all this before
Seen our hearts getting broken, now better we know.

Whether letter, reminder, or just words we won't say
All that I'm now asking of you is to ask me to stay
To hold me tight in your arms from the moment I come
Cos I believe that you know what we both can become.

It's just one of those letters that should never be sent
That should remind us both of the roads that we went -
I believe that just maybe we now got offered a chance
For another shot of new love, for our personal glance.

This is letter unwritten - that shall stay frozen in time
Black spot in the calendar, one more sealed by the rhyme -
One more promise I'll come, one more answer you'll wait
One more day that is left, one more to remember the date.

To Aaron

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[In Blue]

2007-06-16T20:03:00.000+02:00

The night tonight is just so magically blue -
My eyes are so clear and I can see through -
You call me and whisper sweet word after word
Always I miss you when I'm alone in blue world.

Choosing the colors these days I chose blue -
It's always stuck in my mouth with honey and glue -
It's butterflies down there and it's ironically true -
I have a million phases, but my favorite's blue.

It makes me so happy, draws smile on my face -
Blue day is today - and blue in so many ways -
It's kind of amusing, looking through the blue lens
But I am in blue - and it makes perfect sense!

We've never used that boring word "love" -
It's so cliche and it only rhymes with "above" -
It's over-used every day, and rarely is true -
Instead of "in love" we are always "in blue".

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[High Stars]

2007-06-16T19:58:00.000+02:00

High Stars – they are my compass
Where Silhouettes have covered Sky,
On my Heart you are the by-pass,
My broken wings you've taught to fly.

High Stars – they will lay upon us
When Heavens Earth will gently touch,
When litely breeze dries sweat drops on us,
And Cupid’s sighs are loud too much.

High Stars – they'll see us
And know we are the thieves of Love,
Angels – they will wish to be us,
To feel our Freedom in clouds above.

High Stars – salud! It's nearly morning.
We'll vanish with Night's latest star,
Weeps of day'll be silent mourning
For you and who you dragged so far.

To N.

2003©wob
all rights reserved

[Can You]

2007-06-16T19:57:00.000+02:00

Can you remember the time you've put me in rhyme
Captured My Soul and transformed it to thine-
Remember the nights I whispered were Rome,
I cried through your sighs and called you My Home-

Could you feel all my Darkness watching you sleep,
Could you heal what is left if my wounds are as deep-
Can you hear My Soul calling your name in this night,
Can you fear all these Demons I find in my sight-

Feel you the dust that's filling the air-
Feel you the magic that's making me glare-
Feel you the same whilst your dreams knit your day-
Feel you My Love when I'm this far away...?

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[Alas, My Centurion]

2007-06-16T19:55:00.000+02:00

Alas! Short are those rare moments of happiness
When gods with bare joy our lives chose to bless -
Oh, so are sweet all the suffers and all of that pain
All swirled in one and only this love and life game.

Oh give me the sign my dreams aren't fading as fast
As I fall down leaving my mind behind in the blast -
So blinded by this love that to thrill and to kill can
That can blind the wise man and the fool that I am.

Mourn I shall not! - 'cos heavens never were brighter!
Cry I shall not! - you made me the queen and the fighter!
Love you I must - but that's not the choice but the truth
The one who divides us - tears the tree from its root.

Alas! Still long are the nights I am spending without you -
Oh, but so strong are these feelings I am having about you -
I am living for our love, but I am dying without you -
My rhymes are made out of love and all are about you.

My Centurion, this time, my all love's about you...
My Centurion, this Rome is what I am without you.

To Caesar

2006©wob
all rights reserved

[A Toast]

2007-06-16T19:52:00.000+02:00

I just want to make a toast -
Let's all drink from Holy Grail -
For all that's past and gone the most
For paths we trod on road to Hell.

Raise your golden glass up high -
Make toast for all the bad time's now -
It's our blood, this song our sigh
Raise your heads from solemn bow!

I just want to make a toast -
For all my Knights and all my Queens -
For our Kingdom and it's ghost
For our Love and things obscene.

Arthur took the sword form stone -
To prove his right on Holy Grail -
We'll take our Souls onto their throne,
Repair our ships and make them sail.

I just want to make a toast -
Raise your glass, our time has come!
We've conquered past and Hell's own ghost,
Long live our Love and what we'll become!

2007©wob
all rights reserved

[Untitled]

2007-06-16T16:50:00.000+02:00

(I have even lost my Name,
And where was Ice I wished the Flame
- To burn out and to burn in:
To melt the ne'er forgiven Sin.)

It was the Age when Hell got frozen,
The call came out, and I got chosen
- I've danced with Devils, all but one:
Fallen Angel, God's Lost Son.

He made You to be His reflection,
The Man, the God and My Affection
- So I've fallen, lost my wings,
Besides My Life, a thousand things.

He made You ne'er to be the Saint,
Just Temptation, test of Faith
- So lives ago You served to Good
And made me love my Solitude.

Whether Saint or worst from Hell,
(Still I question, but can't tell)
- You're the One who stole my Sleep,
You're the Love I couldn't keep.

To The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[The Call]

2007-06-16T16:47:00.000+02:00

I call the Devil, call the God!
'Cos I need Him by my side –
All the Forces – tie the knot,
Tonight You'll run, but You can't hide!

I call out for Witches' Craft!
No, not the Wind, and not the Draft –
'Cos I need Him for tonight,
All Ghosts – You know it is my right!

I call out for Heavens Lost!
'Cos once I loved, I loved the most –
Father! Son! And Holy Ghost,
I don't care how much it costs!

I call the Devil, call the God!
You know there's no-one by my side –
I'm cut in half and tied in knot,
Too many times I've been denied!

All Religions I embrace –
I curse You to be in my place!
I curse the Day You rest my case!
I call You all tonight to face –
The Hell You made for Human Race!

All For - The Biggest Pretender

2005©wob
all rights reserved

[Tempted]

2007-06-16T16:45:00.000+02:00

On Autumn's Night Sky once Planets collided
And all of the Stars along with them hided
Preparing temptation I could never resist
Spreading the rumor that there You exist.

Accepting my duties I'm sure I refused
To dance with the Devil, let being abused
So I don't realize just how You appeared
Out of Soul scared - though nothing I feared.

Lamb in a wolf's skin with the face of a Priest
Hided from me your Mind of the Beast
And taught you the language only Angels can speak,
Gave you the strength my roars to out-shriek.

Banished from Heavens - in Nowhere I stand
Eager the most for the touch of your hand -
From all that I knew left speechless in shame
Disabled forever to speak out your name.

Between Lost Souls in the Valley of Dark
My crippled Soul wanders, in search for the spark
That once I have felt and let go with the sigh -
Centuries ago, when I was tempted by Lie.

To The Biggest Pretender

2003©wob
all rights reserved

[Silent Prayer For Love - Of The Pretender]

2007-06-16T16:41:00.000+02:00

Oh, God, our Father, the hour has come near
First time to ask a favor, with Hope that You will hear:

I'm swearing on my Heart, feeling no Remorse
For the sake of Love – I'm spelling Sacred Choirs:

Prepared I'm and determined to give up on my Soul,
For This Love and It only – or to never love at all;
And ready true I am on giving up my Heart,
To end all Love inside – if This One shall not start.

I'm swearing on my Soul with no much Regret,
For the sake of Life – I'd die, but not forget:

Prepaired I am so well for Oblivion Obscure
If not blissed with Love that I can feel so pure;
I'm ready for Rejection in becoming the Offender,
If I'm to be denied for loving the Pretender.

In the Name of Heavens – Prayer's my only source
For saving up my Conscience – This Love's my only Force:

Prepaired I'm just too well for Eternity in Hell,
Just for this one Love – for which my Soul I'd sell;
And ready so for Anger on all of You Above
If You are deaf for hearing my Silent Prayer for Love.

In the Name of Yours – cursed's the day we've met,
But I know-not other Gods, so say what I shall get:

Prepaired I'm for Despair that can get no worse,
For this one, Selfish Love – that on's been put a Curse;
And ready to be Doomed, to feel no Love as tender,
For One Love's what I ask for: Love of the Pretender...

Oh God, our Father, long's the Life to wait.
Patience is Salvation – but I’m leaking out of Faith.

To The Biggest Pretender

2005©wob
all rights reserved

[Northern Winds]

2007-06-16T16:39:00.000+02:00

Northern Winds tonight have chilled me,
Along with memories cursed to kill me -
Of winds like these that once have blown,
Filled with feelings once I've known.

You all Above – for what I'm punished?!
All of my Love You have banished –
All of my Dreams You've awaken –
My Heart, my Faith – from me are taken!

Now You answer – for I question:
Are Northern Winds what's Resurrection?
- For You've sent them in wrong season,
Woke up my Sorrow for no reason.

Northern Winds – are You God's words?
Did He see how much it hurts?
Did He hear for what I prayed?
Did He mention Sins are paid...?

Northern Winds – my God can't hear me!
I'm too sleepless – Dreams have feared me,
I'm too helpless – Love has chained me,
I'm too selfless – my Mind insaned me.

Northern Winds – bring back what's taken!
- Or go and leave my Dreams un'waken!
You're all laughing at my Pain –
I give up God! – my God is vain!

Northern Winds, just chill me faster
For what I'm living's Evil Gesture!
I can't pay through Life for Sins –
Blow and kill me, Northern Winds.

To The Biggest Pretender

2005©wob
all rights reserved

[Magic Night]

2007-06-16T16:36:00.000+02:00

All the Ghosts did bless their Souls,
Only mine avoids its goals,
My Soul just for Silence asks,
Only mine's got open tasks.

Magic Night's by Horror haunted,
Only my Soul stayed unhaunted,
Only mine cannot regret,
Nor forgive, nor to forget.

Magic Night's to be the Magic Dawn,
But still, my Soul once more has sworn –
Still denies Love, Hope and Faith,
Still my Soul knows none but Hate.

Simple Magic to the Simple Things,
My Simple Soul rejects its wings,
What to pray for, to achieve? –
No God my Soul knows to believe.

All the Ghosts did bless their Souls,
Only my Soul's left in roars,
My Soul asks for Silence only,
It's in line for "Lost-Souls-Only".

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[Genesis, The Second Part]

2007-06-16T16:34:00.000+02:00

There's the Tale of Human Race,
Tale of Judgment, Tale of Choosing,
Tale of Day we showed our face
With no name of Win, nor Loosing.

Lands and Heavens were adjoined
When Judgment smells have filled the air –
Sun did Earth that day avoid'd,
All the people thrilled, and stared.

From Sky Angels that day flew,
Dressed in white – were seen in Dark,
And though so dull, we all just knew
That one Man has built the Arc.

He, to whom we built the Faith,
That day to us, once more, has shown –
His Hand opened heavy Gate,
And many Souls to Him have flown.

Eager-ones have stayed Downhere,
Eager more to prove we're worth,
Eager-us from Him lost Fear,
So Eager-Him threw us to dirt.

To behold the Suffer we were left,
When Eden fuged right-up, so lite,
To ourselves we kept the Faith,
Though Eden stayed far-up from sight.

It's the Day erased from Books:
Genesis, the second part,
Day of Him who always looks
Where to play a fresh new start.

2002©wob
all rights reserved

[Few Words - Referring To God]

2007-06-16T16:28:00.000+02:00

This Anger of mine's as big as the Holy Pain –
For You being so severe, I took the Shame;
All Love of mine You've sentenced to Silence,
So I've lost all my Paths, I missed all Your Guidance.
But once this Heart felt Sincere Love – one tender,
And punished it got – for the Greatest Pretender...

Yes, God, I know – He was "The One", "The Devil's Son",
And that "what-is-done-can't-be-undone" (no, none),
I still haven't regretted, though You left me alone,
But You resurrected – when we thought You were gone!

Right out from Your Clouds I stumbled to mud –
You have turned this to War, so now what, My God?
Let's get it moving already, it's never too late –
I dare You to prove worth for building the Faith!

Coincidences are not (are they?) one of Your Deeds –
Where is Your Mercy on this Heart that still bleeds?
"Coincidences", God, that's what You've named this!
We've crossed then our swords – so whose here the shame is?!

So, yes, You'll remain deaf for all of My Prayers –
Oh, "God's good and from above He's looking downstairs" –
Didn't it even shake on the Crown to kick me while down (?),
Or You didn't feel like watching what's going on down –
I guess surprise You it did I chose Hell over Thee;
But truly surprise me it would that He'd do it on me!

All for - The Biggest Pretender

2004©wob
all rights reserved

[Bless Me, Father]

2007-06-16T16:25:00.000+02:00

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned,
I don't feel competent for Righteous Deeds,
Where no-one would go - there I have been,
On Angel's Lands I've planted bad seeds.

Forgive me, Father, for thoughts of filth,
Aware I am of the Path I have lost
And though I confess, I don't feel guilt,
My Father, you can help me the most.

Look at me Father, be the first one who sees
Beyond my body - into my Soul,
I'm crying Father, I'm down on my knees
And I am so scared, 'cos it swallowed me whole.

Just listen Father - I know million prayers -
All spoken to Him, for His Love I refused
And I regretted, so be the first one who dares
To share the belief with abandoned and used.

Your Blessings Father afraid I'm to ask,
All the Monks in the world couldn't pay for my Sin,
As Satan's bride I'm wearing this mask
In His enchanted chambers till now I have been.

I'm leaving you, Father, my lips on Your Cross
I'm going back to the Valley of Doomed,
When you are in Heavens, please look across
And pray for me, Father - you'll know to whom.

2002©wob
all rights reserved

[Punching Bag]

2007-06-16T16:19:00.000+02:00

I'm putting on my gloves for you
For all things I lost, destroyed by you -
Punches wait, my mind's enraged
You couldn't taint the heart you caged.

First one goes for time you stole -
Second punch for wounded soul -
Third punch you'll watch from the shade
You'll be laying in the mess you made.

Don't say this is blood on my hands
It's my tears and sweat, my ruined plans -
Shut up and suffer until you feel
How scars are made, how they don't heal.

First round is done - in one knock-down
You better stay down on that ground -
One last punch goes in your face
So you could feel your own disgrace.

I take off to leave my boxing gloves -
They go for all your hates and loves -
For all the tears and past you drag -
I wish you were this punching bag.

2006©wob
all rights reserved